walking towards happiness

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this book tells the story of these last years
living in the darkness that I carry in me
expressing my lust and the desires i lived
lost in the damnation of the ignorant
but i rise up and found in my utter poetry
a reason to chase my happiness above all
and i woke up one day
to find heart beating in love again
 
i am grateful
with life
with the universe
with my love ones
and of course
with each
and every single being on this planet
for simply existing

– adric ceneri

– wounds

a poem from

walking towards happiness

 if only you knew how much 
the sound of your voice hurts
if only i could ignore your spoken words
 
you pushed me away
when you danced on my wounds
you ended up alone
and i was left with an empty soul
 
you are the person who gave me life
but this resentment is something
you just cannot erase
between you and me there is only pain
deep wounds i wish one day
will heal themselves

many times i promised
to ask forgiveness to you and myself
cold and long nights of abandonment
in my corner space
so many times i awaited your return
but it never came
people sentenced me for being the gay orphan
it was my fate
 
biblical stories filled me with horror
ignorance and violence
deprived me of a better world
from one place to the other
without love or compassion
always asking myself if that was the will of the lord
   
i feel alone
with my soul full of rage
time has not cured
my deep wounds
it has only
intensified my pain
 
time has only
wither my joy
it has broken to pieces
my spirit and my hopes


2019. Adric Ceneri. All right reserved.