As today… there were days, difficult mornings, I lost my strength. I felt tired, abandoned and out of faith. It’s hard for me to keep standing, hard to wait for the future to come and take me. Sincerely, I can be strong, not strong enough to avoid memories. And it hurts as hope fades away.
I feel like a bird that wants to fly. I do not feel sure, so I stop. I stayed in loneliness waiting for a try. Trying to get out of hell, I fall. I can’t find myself, lost my sight. There is no way for me to get out of here. I have one chance to destroy my fear. Upon it, my heart was afraid of me.
I have thought about me and my future. I have never been sure of anything. I think something; I believe a different thing. I hear other things, and I see no way out of here. My life is not easy; I’m afraid to not know. I am afraid not to be accepted by the Lord as everybody rejected my love.
I am as the abandoned human on war. Like the grain of sand lost in the desert, like the sight lost between the stars, and the sound that faded in the silence.
I wish to scream but I fear no one can hear. I am sick of fighting against fear. I am tired of living in this wild world. I am tired and I can’t smile to the Lord. I am not happy and I can’t do anything. I am dying of fear. I am afraid to show what I feel.
Adric Ceneri is an LGBTQ artist, poet, writer, and author. He was born in Mexico and lived there during his childhood. He was raised in the coasts of the Pacific Ocean with his parents up to the age of five, and when his parents separated, he had to endure and survive the consequences of his parents’ poor lives choices. The majority of his poetry reflects the pains and sufferings he had to endure. He writes about his sexuality and the events that marked him throughout childhood and the difficulties he faced when he was growing up. Ceneri often writes with a rebellious heart through his poetry, expressing his emotions and always remaining true to who he is as an artist. As a poet and writer, he transmits his feelings and embodies his transgressions in magical word-plays truly transforming pain into art.
With over 17 years in writing and over 10 years since his birth as a published poet and writer; Ceneri has now 2 poetry collections, a set of four-book journals and two anthologies.
Ceneri is currently invested in Magesoul Publishing working with the founder, Carlos Medina and core executives to help the poetry community voices to be heard and recognized.
Adric is a passionate artist, creating books covers such as ‘IT HURTS’, ‘SURVIVAL’ and ‘HEALING’, the first trilogy of anthologies by Magesoul Publishing and for other books published through Magesoul Publishing. Adric also has written a chapter for each of the books in this trilogy of anthologies, poems not published in any of his other books. He is also translating books and creating art for other authors.
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2 thoughts on “MY PHOBIAS”
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